Finally finished

After taking long time for finishing the sketch of “Chinese traditional woman”, I can now say very proudly that it has finally come to an end. It was terrific experience for me. Doing art of Chinese traditional woman was the toughest experience. I have so far completed 100 sketches and I used to finish it within 1 day or 3 hours. 

Surprisingly, for Chinese traditional woman painting, it took me nearly 20 days to complete. Colour sense, costumes, anatomy, background, mid-ground, foreground, everything seem to be greatly composited. And my hands were trembling while colouring for it. Its first time ever happened to me. Well, it’s not too good to claim ourselves as confident person in every aspect right? This is somehow added to my personal experience. I claimed that I could be good artist too. But somehow today almost I felt like I have stepped back to my learning stage once again. 

Art is not difficult, but sometimes I feel it’s difficult when it comes to colour theory. Sketching with dark shaded pencils and leaving the sketch like black and white is easy rather adding colours into it, which actually gives life for that art piece. I was afraid past 20 days I did not put deep focus onto my work which has led to various distractions in painting. But if our body and mind is in full of focus then you need not to turn back and remember past or nothing, everything can be piece of cake once you will think nothing is impossible. So I have finally, won the battle and finished the final sketch of Chinese traditional woman. 

Somehow, I feel little unsatisfied in terms of lack of research towards this painting. Why Chinese painting is seems to be difficult? Their techniques are much unique as compared to any part of the nation’s art in worldwide. But next time, I will be doing research about Chinese painting in order to make myself more improved while taking the step to sketch Chinese people next time

Anyhow, as long as I am sure it’s almost done. So I am sharing my final output with all of you here, I hope you all would love it too. 

My soul connects here...

Who would disagree that “Studio Ghibli” movies are not worth to watch. Of course, everyone would disagree with this stupid statement.  Movies made by Ghibli productions are unique than any other animated films. I have seen “Walt Disney’s”  2D animation films, “Warner Bros” animation films, and then I stepped into “Ghibli Studios” animation films trust me, I got an incredible experience while travelling myself to the film world. 

It is really hard to make an animation films. Because, while making any sort of animation films, it demands unique concept and interesting narrative story.  Apparently screenplay must be also deeply concerned. And once the concept is fixed, and the storyline is decided as interesting, then everything will turn out to be piece of cake work. Even though, if there are no affluent strokes or no proper drawings it does not matter as long as the story is really strong. 

Numbers of American animation films are based on ordinary theme, same storyline. But “Studio Ghibli” animated films do have unique concept. Even though the drawings are not much proper, but technically they are strong. All the films are complete heart touching and soul is connecting. If you believe the same way like I do. Then you must hit like towards this. 

Sketching the traditional Chinese woman is actually very difficult. I thought, I could end this art within snap shot of time. But I was utterly wrong. Perhaps, its taking nearly 6 days’ time for me to finish this beautiful piece of art work. I had to start it from scratch, and then I had to observe every part of image carefully. It has become difficult task for me because, its my first time ever that I have attempted to sketch Chinese traditional woman. As I am Indian, I am really weak at figuring the point of Chinese colour sense.

When I started sketching I have first observed the anatomy of this woman who is laying down herself relaxed on boat. Her anatomy is precisely different from any other nation’s women. If I could take an example of European women they look little chubby, and their body is not much curvaceous, they look too skinny and their anatomy is really easy to observe and implement that onto paper. But, Chinese woman’s anatomy is typical in terms of her deep curvaceous features, her dressing style, height etc., So it is really important to check the anatomy first. And trust me, it took me one whole day to finish this part. Then I went to sketch it. And the rough figure was finished. I thought, I will feel much easier to finish it soon.

But the difficult time arrives, when it comes to colouring. You see, when you paint any image you must know the minimum sense of colour theory. It is because; every country has different perspective towards colours. Chinese really feel fascinate about red and more contrasting colours. In fact, I have also observed in many Chinese movies, that every actor will wear bright and contrasting costumes. Lighting is eye gazing and locations look beautiful as ever. It just attracts the viewer eyes. But in other countries such as America, India or England, they never make movies with bright contrasting colours or lighting. And they always prefer to choose a darker colour which has to be dim. So, keeping this in my mind I was observing the Chinese painting colour sense. Even in their art forms, many great artists have painted using attractive colours. I think this is the reason why I believe, China is an attractive country that anyone should actually visit here to enhance the feel of nature.  Whatever we take either landscape art, or people art, animals, nature, flowers everything related to China is fantastic and masterpiece.

Similarly I have faced this incredible experience when I was painting traditional Chinese woman. I was really conscious about choosing the right colour which can fit into the place. My hands were trembling when I was painting the costume of woman. Because the costume was seem to be like silk and other layers were free and transparent. So I had to keep my eye focussed on, to give the great output. Today, I have finally finished colouring the boat and water. There was bluish green colour reflecting on water, and the boat was appearing as pretty old and traditional. Well anyways, I have finally finished the work but not completely it is still incomplete. Apparently, I need some more time to observe the background part now. Because as you will see, the background behind this woman is still white in colour. I have to paint background using right colour theory in order to match with the perspective of woman, boat and water. So, I am excited to see the final output now…

This will be my first sketch ever of Chinese traditional woman. I will be sharing with you all now. So I hope you can judge me too…

The first rough work 

Final coloured output for costume part 

Background has to be painted still

Mother and father, please give me freedom, please do not control my life

My boyfriend was true, his statement was absolutely right. He told me three days ago that he could never understand the situation of Indian family. He thinks that Indian family issues are like world war and for every small thing they will create huge mess. I think he is absolutely right. His perspective towards Indian family cannot change now; in fact I cannot change either. It is just because of me. I have shared every small thing about my family issues with my boyfriend. Perhaps, I thought I should not hide anything from him it is so important for me to confess the truth about family also. But, I guess I feel regret now. I should not have shared anything about my family because, my boyfriend is feeling little insecure about my case and I guess he is getting afraid to step into my family now. But I was helpless myself it’s me to be blamed. 

It is the matter of fact that every Indian family is over conservative. Before doing anything, something, they just keep thinking about society first. “What does society think, if I will do this?”. “What does society think, if I will go there?”, “What does society think, if I am not here?”, “What does society think if I marry this person”?, “What does society think if I could do any job?”. Every matter is related with society. I feel sorry that Indian parents do rely on society before doing something but before doing this, they just forget that they do not own any identity. My Parents belong to this category. My parents always think about others but they cannot think about their own happiness. My parents do think about future and they get worried so easily. When we don’t know what is going to happen in future why to stress at that point? It’s completely baseless… I am also feeling sorry that my parents would accept every simple issue like world war. Probably, its because of generation gap or communication gap I really do not understand this. But I am sure of one thing, they are not enjoying their lives and they don’t let us to enjoy either.

 I am suffering with this problem since my childhood, and I feel like this is enough and I have to end this. But unfortunately due to my lack of independency, and that I am unable to earn money for myself, I cannot stand high on my feet in this typical Indian society. I wanted to be selfish, but I cannot be selfish. After all, they are my own family members I have no rights to abandon them but I do know, that they want to control my life and I cannot accept this. Because of this, my parents are upset with me, and their angst level is raising high towards me, but I am helpless I want to lead my own life too.  I am seeing every Chinese children having harmonious family. Every person is individual and they do mind their own business rather being interfering in other’s and creating big mess. My boyfriend told me about Chinese adult people. He said, “When boy or girl enter into adult age they will not depend on anyone and they will become sensible to handle their own life. Parents also do not force their wishes because they believe on their own kids that they will never take the direction of wrong path”. Upon hearing this, I felt jealous. I feel envy of Chinese children. How lucky Chinese kids are… They got liberal parents and everyone co-ordinate to each other. 

In India it’s different even though children reach to adult age, even though they have their own rights to choose their life, parents cannot accept this point. They still control their children and they will decide their future. For example, is me. I am 21 year old now, and I am matured. I figured out the differences between right or wrong. So I am well capable enough to judge my own life. I am myself, and I always wanted to be myself. My parents do not accept this decision of mine. They do force me even till now, to obey them. I will obey them when it is something about which I don’t know. But I cannot obey them about everything. They wanted me to get married with one Indian boy who belongs to their same caste. I did not agree, I chosen my own by getting into serious commitment with one Chinese boy. My mother did not agree with this decision. She thought, I was bad girl and I am trying to destroy their reputation. But I still did not give up, and I stood stubborn upon my decision. By seeing me, my mother has accepted but I cannot figure out in her eyes that she did not accept with her whole hearted. I cannot complain about it, and there are no regrets I am extremely happy with my actions. When I shared about this case with my boyfriend, he said, he is afraid that he could fall apart one day. I don’t know with who else I can talk to, so I am only consoling my own soul. 

Life is really tough. My boyfriend was right towards me because, he thinks I am really unlucky person to born in this kind of family. I still feel unlucky the same. But now, I cannot think about this any longer. I know, I must be really strong to deal with any situation. I have completed my graduation, grown up, my mind is matured, I am aged around 21 but am I still kid to get afraid of anyone’s fierce commands? What happened to me? I was brave, I was strong, and I used to be myself. Then why is that suddenly I am falling apart easily??? Why cannot I enjoy my own life??? 

I am changed. Once upon a time, I was kind of girl who used to be over talkative. Who used to argue over anything very badly, who used to throw hot temper on everyone? But this girl has changed now. She is no more over temper girl. She has become calm, she is smiling, and she is easily forgiving everyone. She is learning to lead life in sensible manner. And I am proud of myself now. But my mom thinks I am avoiding them. If she thinks this way, I am helpless…

Dear mother and father, I am sorry I have tried many ways to get good impression from you. But you both never understood what I want.. I wanted freedom, I wanted to cherish my life with friends. You both had never let me to go out with my friends for watching movies. You both had never let me to be myself; you both had never trusted me. And this is really hurting now. When you both lost trust on me completely then I think I have nothing to do myself to prove something. Because, no matter whatever I am doing, you do not respond properly. If I get the job, you both would never congratulate me with happiness. If I have become independent, you both think that I am avoiding but actually, I am grown up to take my own decisions now. I wish you both could live together happy. And forget about me, I can handle my life in a right way much better than other’s. I am just disappointed to born as your daughter. I wish I could have such parents who can love me for what I am. Who can own me as what I am… 

I lost my freedom, now I am crazy about freedom. No one should ever experience my life this way. I got the sense of epiphany suddenly. I should not force anyone; everyone has to enjoy their own life. I won’t force my boyfriend also, he must cherish his own life. I won’t friends my either because they have their own business. If there is no force everything will be alright. I am experienced with this, so I would never do such stupid mistake again in my life. Never ever!

Love in the entertainment industry is like a game

It was just one year ago, when we heard the splitsville news of famous HongKong celebrity couple "Nicholas tse and Cecilia cheung" has created big storm in entertainment industry. Love between these two had faded away very soon when the moment Nicholas tse quickly discovered that Cecilia cheung is going back to wrong path. Ever since news has spreaded over of Cecilia taking still pictures with former lover Edison chen in flight while landing to Taiwan gave misery shock to the fans. It's an unpredictable fierce crossed acrossed Nicholas tse's reputation either... Cecilia cheung had already embroiled with sex scandal pictures causing from Edison chen and her marriage was in rocks. But, it was Nicholas tse who gave her second chance to survive good life again. Love can disappear just within fraction of seconds in celebrity life. Perhaps, we lame audience also indulge into this news and we grieve over their seperation.

After their seperation, media went on to hunting the news coming from Nicholas tse and Cecilia cheung. Even till today, we see some crazy news between them and they make headlines for every simple things. Sometimes we read the news that Nicholas tse stayed four late nights at his wife's apartment to take care of children or when Lucas tse fallen sick, Cecilia addressed Nicholas as "Husband" in hospital. Every simple issue can become headlines in showbiz. Especially when it comes to the issues of complicated relationships. The saga has ended as soon as Nicholas tse confirmed tabloids that he would no longer see Cecilia cheung but they can still remain good friends for the sake of their children healthy growing family atmosphere

These headlines can create big mess not only to showbiz but even with the daily life style of normal public environment. It so stupidity that some ordinary people would compare their complex relationship with divorced celebrity couple. Because the media is creating hype on this separation stories even ordinary people cannot help to indulge into these articles.

Fans get too much broiled over this news and they start to hate respective celebrity. And I would take faire example again of Nicholas tse and Cecilia cheung here. There are numerous fans who supported Nicholas tse in this issue and they hated Cecilia cheung. Some fans supported Cecilia cheung's bravery attempts. Even if her films are flop, they blame on her rocky marriage issues but not on film stories. It could be really interesting but somehow its really impractical thing happening in showbiz these days. And also, no one ever talks about celebrity talents but their personal affairs will be definitely something to talk in limelight.

Similarly when, Nicholas tse and Cecilia cheung's secret wedding pictures also released in the internet has become much "talk about issue" in tabloids or forums. There were also other news released that Nicholas tse was really unhappy with the wedding pictures that released in internet and Cecilia cheung acclaimed that he is being transparent towards "Love". And this has also become issue in showbiz. "Love" is not valued in showbiz and its rather treated like game which we will wait for the result "Who won and who lost"

Similar saga is now arrived in Hollywood also. Robert Pattinson and Kristen stewart break-up drama just seem to be very closer to Nicholas tse and Cecilia cheung's story. Robert pattinson discovered the truth behind Kristen stewart's life that she is being in relationship with already married Film maker Rupert Sanders. And this news has also widely spread over the internet, blogs and tabloids.

But Robert pattinson made the news very clear that he would not go back to Kristen stewart again and he would not give her second chance also. I guess Robert pattinson is not considerate like Nicholas tse in this case. Kristen stewart is making headlines with her news that she is going into depression after this incident rushed like a storm in Public. This "Twilight" couple is also embarassed to face themselves in media. 

"Twilight series" film maker made it clear in interviews that couple needs privacy rather than being published in media about their break up story. It would also spoil the industry reputation if media keep doing this. 

But media cannot be considerate towards these stories right? When the storm begins it is so obvious that news reaches extreme hype that it will effect the films reputation also. Now fans are no more willing to watch "Twilight movie" just because of Kristen stewart's scandal pictures has been exposed in media. So what is the relationship between celebrities personal issues and films here??? 

And some famous celebrity couple often create headlines with their on and off relationship rumours. And the firm example here is "Justin beiber and Selena Gomez". Media had reportedly informed the news long time ago that this teenage couple may take seperation for the reason over their indifferent personalities and lack of understanding. The couple has reported to comeback in their normal relationship mode.

They are now famous for being tagged as "Publicity stunt performers". Is this why, love has just become like game in showbiz? Media also reveals news of these public figures break up drama, which also effects nothing but simply nonsense.

Showbiz celebrity couple can easily deceive to each other and can also easily move on. Some of them may be truly grieving over but some of them treat these emotions like game. Some famous showbiz couple may go on dating for promoting their films just like "Zac Efron And Vanessa Hudgens"

It isn't false that "Love is considered like game in showbiz all is fair in showbiz"

Picture of "Johnny Depp and Vanessa paradis" who also created waves with headlines about their end of 14 years relationship. And it was reported that it was "Johnny depp" who reportedly deceived his long term girlfriend

                                            

Life is like a melody

Life is like a melody, beautiful music. God like nature, every day like a spring flowers bloom. Life is rich and colourful like a rainbow, interesting as a series of movies, life is delicious like an ice cream and sweet like candy

Life has a positive quality and its pure gift from angel. So why don't we design our life most simple? We work hard every day until we sweat, earning so much money. We have been planning how much amount of money do we make? But we are not counting our life of how many quantity of hours we get to enjoy. Time is short, let our soul unleash from extreme busy schedule to make ourselves happy. We each have a professional, work, we wake up early, dress up fast, breakfast together speed movement, and run to the office. We sat for hours, and don't have time on our eyes blink at least.

How was the world used to be, before technology has introduced? How did people really cherished their lives with extreme charm?  What happened to the natural environment?  Why do flowers dither? Why is our human tendency shaking? We couldn't find a solution to the problem.

Once upon a time, I see my neighbor's funeral. He is an age in 35, have two children. He died in office work in the middle of the night. 35 is not a old, but why did god write short lines of fate? Extreme pressure of work can take away your life, but you can't get positive signs from it 

Think about it, we do earn millions of money , getting fat pay cheque, are we still happy? What is that you still feel something important part of your life is missing? We all do work, but where is happiness? We need to spend life with those affluent moments, where we can assure that our happiness exists there 

Highly qualified people work in metro cities, they look outside at labour children playing with jubilant mood. Why do we have to feel envy of them? Of course, we need to struggle to settle down in our life, but we need to remember something that, we cannot recall time back. We can only recall our memories. But what is the use of recollecting memories when you realize the truth that it is never going to come back. So, we must always think about present moment. Even though you have hectic work, let us take half of the time from it and we will do what we love to do. Because as I said, time is short world can end any time so before we regret of missing precious things in our life, we need to cherish it with your present time. Always cherish! cherish! because life is like a melody and its truly a beauty. 

Because, its everything about Love

If your mobile is damaged, you can buy another one, if your computer does not work you can repair it, if you lost your job you can find another one. If you lost your career, you can take up another career. If your mood is off, you can regain it back by listening to music or doing some interesting things that where your heart belongs to...

In life everywhere you take a wide trip, you will find various alternative options to switch it on. But for one thing you cannot find an option. You might wonder what is it about? Its an emotion of "Love". Love cannot have different options. Let us make it simple. For example, if you love someone very deep you feel everytime to be with that person and your world belongs to them. Perhaps if you loose that person your heart stucks, and it cannot move on. Your body moves, you will change clothes, you will eat food, you will walk around, you will smile, you will play, you will study. But what happens to your mind? It cannot move at all. It cannot change, it cannot look for alternative options. You will think about that person every second of your life.

First thing that you must notice is, if you love someone please do not let it go away from your hands. It is not simple to regain back just like mobiles or computers that you can regain back when you throw it away. You cannot buy heart, you cannot buy same person, you cannot buy love and affection, you cannot uy the same emotions that what you had for your loved ones. So, why do you still want to sit behind? Most of us leave love behind is because of two reasons

1) Family problems

2) hyper career problems

Is that what your really worried about? When we keep sacrificing our things, do you think you will be happy? We buy different materials to make ourselves happy since our childhood we keep asking our parents "Mother and Father, can you buy this dress for me? " or "Can you give me some money to go out with my friends"? When we do not have fear to ask these from parents then why is then why is that we get afraid of express our thoughts about marrying our loved ones? It is so painful of loosing the love rather than anything else.

So we must hold it back, as long as we are alive we want someone to spend the rest of our life with. We want the perfect soulmate who can listen to our problems and who can wipe our tears. This is not just the dream of girl but boys do have same dreams. And the second problem is about professional issues. You can earn money in may ways, but just for the sake of earning money, you loose every fun happening in your life. You do not want to love, because you sacrifice your life for job. We agree, career is most important path to reach destiny but we cannot completely fall apart. We need to balance our attitude from work to emotions. Work is not just the life. When your tired, coming back home, with who else you want to talk to make your mind refreshed? When your lover hugs you from behind and asks you "Honey are you tired?"... This is the best part ever happening in your life. Do you want to miss this???

Like I say, live the life fullest with love and work. Give more love, take more love this is the only way you will get the happiness. Love is not just materials that you can get it somewhere in the market. It is precious. It is hard to find, and very easy to loose. So hold it tight until you breathe. Because love makes life beautiful

Friday mood

Everybody wants to come out of darkness and want to cherish their life with ease. No one wants to stay in the darkness and carrying pains on shoulders for the rest of your life. It is so obvious these days; we suffer with many suffocating problems either professional or personal. But believe me; I guess many people would go through tough times when it comes to personal experiences. Such as heart breaks, complicated relationships (Not to be mentioned only between couples but also can happen with family), causes of ill-fated friendship etc., the list goes on... But I just feel like I am suffering with these problems

I am tired of losing and trying to gain back something the important part of my life. Past four years I have been losing the course of love, some people left me with no reason and I am just going through miserable condition. And I was really happy that finally I found true love in my life. But this seems to be really horrible than anything. I saw my friends committed happily with their partners and they live in same cities they meet so often, go out to have some fun, going around to watch films, they will have fun at shopping, they go to ice-cream parlour and I feel envy deeply envy of them. Some of my friends who go for date with their boyfriends will invite me too for accompanying them, I feel hesitated because I do not want to ruin their precious time. At that moment, I will miss my boyfriend very much. I get such stupid feeling that I keep blaming my fate that why is my boyfriend is not with me right now? Why is he far away from me? What is the point of having long distance relationship? Trust me, it’s been two years over now and we did not meet not even single day. But nowadays I just hold my breathe tight to my neck. I am getting cry, but cannot even expose my tears in front of anybody. It’s been hard going through this feeling. I thought, am I being too much emotional? But this thought did not lasted for long the moment when I heard my boyfriend also told me that he too feels the same as me and he revealed out his deeper inside of emotion yesterday night this way, "I just wanted to meet you, I really want to meet you, how I wish we were together now". The tears has gushed down with sudden rush of flow and I thought how could God be so cruel? Every single minute, I think this way that "How is he, what is he doing?".

He is struggling really hard to settle down in his life and to give bright future to his families as well. Sometimes he keeps blaming that why is he born poor? What answer do I have for this? I don’t have any solution at all. I wish I could meet him; right now I have the curse from God to remain in darkness of love. Yes! I am still living under darkness of love until I meet him; I cannot be fleeing from the curse. But I know, how much do I mean to him, and he knows how he means to me. So we better understand to each other that are fair enough. Now I really get dreams that I am living in the dark room under cursed black shadow. There is no point of brightness, I can’t catch the glimpse of light, and I can only feel I am just laying down here waiting for my love to come closer to me. I want to make my heart fly breaking the curse of darkness. I was too much indulged into my feelings, and I expressed it through my art form yesterday. It has come out so beautiful that I got beautiful tears in my eyes; I cannot imagine how beautifully my thoughts were travelling. I would love to share with you all by here now; I hope you all would love it too... 

‎"I make my heart free from curse of darkness", this is the concept of my today's art work that I have completed just now... Medium: Dry pastel colors and 7B dark shaded pencils

WEDNESDAY MOOD

It is so good to know when your leading life with an illusion every time. You never want to shatter it because, if we pass through illusions we know how much happy we are every day. I personally, love to be in illusion mood. Precisely, doing art works makes me feel this way. I should say something; we have power we can hold on to it. We don’t have to give up on anything. That means, we have power to create our own world also. And I have developed my own world already which only exist me and my paintings. Whatever art works I did so far, it connects to me, depicts my emotion and passion in it. I used to be weak to hold the pencil now I am puffed up with pride to say “Yes I can hold my pencil and I can paint my imaginations”.

But, I must admit one fact unfortunately 1 week I haven’t done anything. I did not practice my writing skills and sketching. Ever since my mom threw away one of my piece of art work I lost my ability to focus further. But, I regained my energy today and sketched one beautiful sunset view in jungle. Its little disappointing for me because, this art work is giving me too much sense to go past and rewind my previous sketches. Strokes were not professional and I was afraid I could not fix right colour tone to give the feel of sunset view. But surprisingly, after the completion of entire work I first showed to my sister. The minute she saw my work, she screamed out with excitement tone and told me “It’s brilliant masterpiece”. I felt really happy and confident. Then I shared my works with my overseas friends they said, “It’s brilliant abstract painting”. Now I have really no words. You see! When you finish something, it’s good to show others. Because they will give you feedbacks in such a way that you have never expected about something surprise would happen. This means, I consider myself, that I am lucky to beautiful feedbacks on my today’s art work.

Anyway, I will share with you all by here. But before sharing the picture, I would like to say some few things about this work. The Concept is “Beautiful Sunset in Jungle”, medium: Dry pastel colours, 7B dark shaded pencils. I have never been to jungle anytime somehow; I imagined jungle in my own way and out stroke on paper to finally finish it. So this is the output I got. Wow! It does not look so bad. It makes me feel just like having beautiful sunset view, and I wanted to sit there for some time. Well, I do not want to praise my work so high but I would love to hear some of your views on it ha ha.. ;-)