The feelings of Madhu when she leaves Nic... (It's break up scene between Nic and Madhu for my movie)

Madhu will leave Nic but why does Madhu feel regretful??? Because she was over demanding towards her sweetheart and she has always asked him to come online and leave so many messages. "Imagining the world to be illustration and I thought love could be fairyland dream. Finally, I had to leave him for his benefit because, he does not like all this shit... I was wrong I was totally wrong, because, I did not treat him well, I was kid, crazy and shown my recklessness towards his love. When he went away threatened me to break up or it was his real feelings I still don't know. So I had to endure it hard very very hard. I trembled a lot with fear sat in one corner and then my world seems to be dark. Who is Nic?? He is far away from me, neither touches his pale skin, nor seen his sweet smile in live but I know how much he loved me but why do I have to act so crazy and annoying that finally he became speechless towards my actions and emotions.. Now who is Nic?? He became like one robot. He became like one miserably human being. Is it because of me?? Or is it became of his family??? Sometimes he behaves very strange that I feel like hitting him with one hammer and ask him "Why are you doing this to me?? Am I bored ??? " And then he reveals out that he is poor, has no money... I should believe him or not??? Sometimes I will suspect him that he is with another girl but its actually not, because his friends always tell me he is the one made for me.

Your not the hero neither I am hero nor anyone hero in this world. But the real hero is that, when you give everything to someone and something in return when you do not expect anything but just think about he or she happiness all the time from where you gain real happiness. I am regretting completely. Because, yes everyone was right, and all his good friends to whom I spoke all the time whenever there was any hardship is coming between me and Nic, they have been telling me "Madhu your not giving him peace or liberty he is very very good person he cares about you but your not understanding his heart".... And so I am regretting. Yes you all are right, I am wrong I am completely wrong now I am regretting... What can I do??? I got true love, First ever true love, I should have been happy but I have let it go just like that from my hands with recklessness and my crazy behavior,.. How can I talk to Nic??? How can I face him with confidence??? Whenever I will see him, my head will bow down with shame and regretful. I will not get any words to say but whenever I talk I feel guilty that why am I talking shit nonsense??? Is it me who is talking to me. I am the girl who screwed him up completely with my hands. Now with what face I must apologies him??? Never let it go....Yes, if there is true love in us we can do whatever he or she thinks for us. But what did I contribute??? Nothing actually, nothing.... I always said I loved him truly, madly and deeply, and this is what screwed him up. How much he suffered??? Was he sleeping properly night times??? Was he concentrating well??? He has so many things to do?? Who am I to create problems in his life??? I entered like an Angel in his life, but turned like demon again. Is there any evil spirit in me that is grabbing me back against Nic??? He used to love me very very much... But now, it seems relationship is uncomfortable task for him, its not his fault its my fault. I was over demanding, I was crazy, I was like one bitch who banged his head with hammer down down down.. I was like one giant beast who dig his heart with hole and finally left him speechless about me that I cannot explain how I am feeling now... But I can say one thing, I never got feelings on anyone this way like this before... Men broke up with me, but I never thought about them neither looked back and recollected my mistakes but I was going on with my life heading towards bright side for bright future, Certainly things changed after meeting Nic... I am changed like one beautiful girl in which emotions bloomed like roses in my heart, I began to cry for someone, I began to laugh seeing happiness with him. But I am letting it go in vain... I cant stand the pain without him, I cant stand the pain without his love... "Dear Nic you dont do anything to me, you dont talk to me, you dont look at me you don't smile at me but I have no rights to ask your forgiveness but please dont leave me. My heart trembles I wake up with nightmares screaming out loud that something happened to my world without you... Please dont go away, may be I am addicted to you. Take your own time to forgive me , Because my dreams are shattered without you. And my demands have shattered everything on you... I have nothing vision now, just seeking your love that is all"... To Nic's friends a message "Dear friends, sorry sorry sorry very very sorry that I have been troubling you all the time crying, acting crazy, swindling so much with deep crack emotions and I am screwing you up also. Please all forgive me,.... How can I be happy now??? "  It seems my life seems to be quiet regretful. But I would tell to every girl "Dear girls, please dont let it go... Boys love you, but we dont understand them sometimes that hurts their feelings. Ultimately we will loose them and then we will understand what is their love actually, so please be in patience coz they love you but dont be like me otherwise you all will be losers in miserable directional of life"... I am trembling hard, gosh is this cold??? or fear??? "